Reality Sinks In, But the Dream Doesn't Die

Well, my friends, I have come to a very important, but not discouraging, realization. I have been in Boston for over a month. I have a job, I have classes. I have made a friend, though I am still homeless. I have experienced Boston in a more intimate way that would not have been possible by a mere tourist trip. I have lived here, I have worked here, I will attend school here. I am rich in experience and covered in glory and a wealth of knowledge of one of the most historical cities this country has to offer.

But I'm poor as fuck.

I thought that by being 25 and financially independent, and being out of state (and thereby having a higher need, meaning more money) that I would be able to survive in Boston without much of a problem.

I was wrong.

The housing market is gruesome. The rent is 400-600 on the low end, and it only gets higher. Utilities can get up to $100 or more during the winter, and the wealthy extort the poor, even those they consider their friends. What about financial aid? Doesn't that give you plenty of dough since you're independent? Well.....no. Even though I'm getting $33000 in financial aid, that is split into two semesters, $5000 of that is work study, which I have to earn over time on a paycheck by paycheck basis.

I was able to quickly find a work study job, and not just any work study job. I work at the Brookline Public Library. Do you know who's from Brookline? And went to this library? These guys:

That's right. I work at the library that JFK and Conan O'Brian had their first library cards at. It's pretty awesome. But as awesome as my job is, and as many hours as I'm working, I've still had to max out my loans and grants, and pay $1,469 out of my work on top of it. And somehow find first and last month's rent for an apartment. And then pay for heat in the cold Massachusetts winter. And then do it all again every semester until I owe my soul and that of my first born child to the State of Massachusetts.

Don't get me wrong. I love this place, and I made the right decision. If I had made the prudent choice and stayed in California, I would have regretted not coming and hated California more, and always wondered what it would have been like if I just packed my bags and left. This is a grand experience and a greater adventure. I don't regret this for a moment. I've learned a lot about life, money, education, people, community, and culture, and I still have 4 and a half months to go. Boston is my favorite city, but the people make the place, and it's missing my favorite people.

It's not over though. I will still be getting an awesome education here, even if it is only for a semester. If I can make it longer you better believe I'll stay. But if not....if I have to return to California to pay a reasonable fee for a reasonable, but not as awesome, education, then I will do so, and I will have the unforgettable experience of having lived in one of America's greatest cities, and studied history in one of the best places for it. I love Boston. I love it more than any place I've ever been. But I'm not willing to sell my soul for it. Instead, I will earn my degree, go to grad school, and someday apply for jobs in the Commonwealth. Get paid to live here rather than pay to live here. So I hope you guys don't think ill of me for accepting the reality of my situation. But I have a proposal for you. I will live up my time here as best as I can. I'll get to know the best restaurants, museums, pubs, taverns, wenches, parks, and activities, and then next summer, I'm coming back. I hope some of you will come with me and let me share with you my favorite city in the way that I know it. Would you rather see it in a group of tourists, or would you rather see it with a friend who's spent 6 months here? Let me know who wants to come with me, because the only thing missing from this city is someone to share it with.

I'll see you guys again soon. Sooner than any of us thought, but I hope you don't hold that against me. I'd rather be able to save money and come stay in a hotel with you guys than stay here and sleep in a park. I got the taste I wanted, and I'll have months more of it. And one day I'll come back, better prepared, and more stable. And hopefully some of you will come with me.