Fair Winds and Pleasant Seas

I have finally realized something this month. This last year has been pretty hard. Soul shattering depression, gut wrenching poverty, bone chilling cold.....it wasn't easy. But I think I realized that the main reason for all the difficulty I've experienced is not the environmental or financial factors of my existence, but rather the tether that I have refused to let go of. When I came out to Boston it was for a new start. It was to get away from California and find out what I'm capable of. But I held onto my relationships too tightly. My loves, my friends, my band....all of it is a part of who I am, but also a past to which I held on too tightly and it kept me anchored to Humboldt when I should have been focused on the reason I came to Boston in the first place: History. I have finally realized what I've been doing and now that I see it, it's easy enough to weigh anchor and move ahead at full sail. I am now devoted to my whole life in Boston and my education. I will make friends here, and I won't be afraid to talk to the most beautiful girl in the room, or make friends with the people in my major in order to stay sane during the cold winters. I'm not saying goodbye to you guys, I'm just throwing myself into my environment. You are all so far away that it's time I focus on who's nearby and willing to be my friend and show interest in my lectures on meaningless facts in history. It's truly time for me to sail boldly into that great vast sea with a heading of the second star to the right and straight on 'til morning. I will return from time to time, but I can really, truly see now that Humboldt is not my home and I don't think it ever will be again. There really is nothing there calling for my return so unless I become a Professor of History at HSU I shall likely never stay more than 10 days in Humboldt County. But should you all ever find yourselves in Boston, look me up.

26: Another Reference Point

It's 2013 and I'm 26 years old today. I am officially closer to 30 than 20, my teen years are far behind me and my days of excessive drinking and loafing around are over. When I was 24 I decided to really start taking control of my life and taking risks that would hold the greatest potential for my happiness. That's what led me to Boston, and  over the last year I have changed and learned a lot.

This time last year I was quite alone. I worked for several hours at the Brookline Public Library and then went to Faneuil Hall to buy a hat and a clam chowder dinner for one. I was homeless and pretty scared that my adventure would end before it really ever began. But with prayer and hard work, my situation improved drastically, and here I am a year later still going.

Today I'm a little broke, but that's because this year I have rent to pay, and that took up all my money, where last year, I was saving for a house I wasn't sure I'd ever get. But tonight I'm doing more than having dinner for one. This year, though I have less money, I have more friends, and therefore I will be out having quality fun. My friend Nicole from school is taking me out to a comedy show in Cambridge, it's Industry Night at work, meaning I get a free beer and maybe even a shot of whiskey. Overall, my situation has improved in the last year, and though I have had some rough patches, I am quite happy. I'm even remembering why I love school and history so much now that my friend Maya is back from England and we can talk about our goals together. There's just something about having someone who's as motivated as you and has the same interests and similar goals that helps you keep your ambitions in the front of your mind. Life is pretty good at 26, and I hope it only gets better from here.